Parking lot sharks and why I hate them
I’m sure everyone has encountered what I like to call a “parking lot shark” at least once in their lifetime.
I personally hate them.
They are those drivers who are too lazy to get a spot where they have to walk 500 meters. These are the people who see you minding your own business, walking to your car with arms full of bags from your previous location. What do they decide to do? Stalk you until you get to your car. Their next plan of action is to put on their blinker in order to claim your spot as “theirs.”
You can find them in their purest form during the Christmas season. In my case, I am unfortunate enough to encounter them on a daily basis because I go to college. College students, like the rest of America, are lazy.
Here’s my beef with them.
I do not want anyone invading my personal space, and this includes people behind the wheel. Seriously. How creepy is it to look behind you and see a car inching a little bit with every step you take. Do you think the person in that car will do the same if they were walking behind? I don’t. It’s because they have their nice Mercedes to hide behind.
Part two of my beef is the fact that by the time they stalk me, wait for me to turn my car on (which if I know I’m being stalked, I prolong the process) and back out, they could have already reached their destination if they chose the further route they hastily avoided.
If I have time on my hands, and know I have a shark behind me, I will purposefully go out of my way to piss them off. This happened about a week ago when I was getting out of class and the sharks were swimming.
Now here’s the backstory:
The reason I have such a prime spot is because I get my ass into work at 8:00 a.m. three days a week. Since a vast majority of students on this campus are lazy, there are plenty of spots for my taking. So when I get out of class at 1:00 p.m. there are plenty of lazy asses just starting their day. I’m sorry, but I really don’t think they deserve to take over what was once MY SPOT. I worked for that spot, and what did they do? Went to 5 bars the night before, woke up at noon, drove to campus and STALKED ME.
Uh-uh, honey.
Moving on to the story. I was walking through the parking lot and there’s an obvious shark behind me. My car was currently located further back in the lot, so this driver was stalking me for a while. They were relentless. Instead of honoring their determination and giving them my spot, I decided to to a disservice to their annoyance and cross over to the next row of cars, dodging inbetween places where even their 2007 Honda Civic could not go. The result: Obvious frustration in the tone of them speeding off.
The moral of the story is: don’t car stalk me. I don’t pity you. I won’t give you a spot. Learn how to walk further. It’s good for you.
